Wait. W.A.I.T. Why am I talking? It’s usually something that I mention to people who are starting a new job. I always talk about positive expectation. When you’re hired for a job, employers generally have positive expectations. I think people show up to new jobs, they often feel they have to prove that they’re going to contribute. I encourage them to remember that this is something that’s already been decided; that’s the thought and the expectation people have about them. They should be in learning mode, and WAIT is a great acronym to remember: Why am I talking?
Yesterday I was in a situation where I wanted to blow off some steam. It was a charged situation. I wanted to send a text about someone in the room with me, and I thought to myself what value am I adding by saying something negative? It was about a caregiver, in this case. Yeah, is she my favorite person? No. Is she the best person for the job today? Yes. So why would I say something negative?
It made me think about a conversation I’ve recently had with two of my friends – my best friend Marion, and a very good friend, Dana. We’ve all come to realize that some things are better left unsaid, including between us. These are people with whom I very intimate and have honest, candid conversation. We all have those relationships where we have permission to just be really honest and to speak what’s on our mind, and at this stage it might be better to dial it back a little bit.
This is also with regard to commentary about other people. We’d tend to say ‘oh, this person said that’, or ‘what do you think of her?’, and we’ve all three made a conscious decision to offer up our opinion a little bit less. To button it up a little more. It’s like what value does it add making a negative observation or asking somebody’s opinion, which is basically inviting them to say something negative about a third party? It’s like, yeah, we don’t need to do that anymore.
‘m going to end it here with that acronym, which is an easy way to remember: Wait, why am I talking? Do I really need to make that comment? Do I really need to ask someone what they think? When there’s a negative intention, there are some things which are simply better left unsaid.
That’s all for now. Until next time, from my heart to yours.
