Episode 147 Flexing Our Adaptation Muscle

December 8, 2023

Good morning from Punta del Este. You heard that right, I’m in Uruguay. In case you didn’t listen to Wednesday’s episode, I received a telephone call from my dear friend Eric Egan. And let me just say when Eric calls and starts the conversation with I had a cockamamie idea, I usually find my cup of whatever it is I’m drinking to sit down. I know it’s going to be a long conversation.

Th time his cockamamie idea was actually a genius win win. Not only was I solving a really complicated personal problem of his, he was inviting me to come visit him -oOn his dime – and I get to see a new country and a place that’s very important in his life, through his eyes. So that’s what’s going on in my world right now

Anyway, when I arrived here in Punta del Este, Eric was not here. He was in Buenos Aires. His husband picked me up at the airport, took me to my Airbnb and gave me the keys to their car.  So the first couple of days I was jet lagged and disoriented and Eric finally arrived yesterday. He took me to this amazingly beautiful place for lunch when I picked him up at the airport.

Before I go on, let me just emphasize how incredible it is to see and experience a new place through the eyes of a local. I got to just look out the window and hear Eric tell me stories. He is an incredibly astute observer of so many different aspects of a culture and a country. He becomes a student of places that interest him.He knows a lot about local laws, real estate, how people move and work and generally what makes a place tick. So it’s particularly special to be in a place he loves and is so incredibly knowledgeable about.

Anyway, as we were driving home from our lovely lunch yesterday, Eric said to me I’ve been really impressed how you’ve been able to roll with this whole thing.  His comment led me to share with him something that I think has been one of the most important things I’m getting out of this experiment and that’s flexing this what I’m calling my adaptation muscle.

The story I was telling myself when I left New York was that I wanted to put myself outside my comfort zone, I wanted to feel free, I wanted to experience what it feels like to move around without some grand strategic plan.Feeling my way forward. Waiting to be called to make a decision to move or to go someplace new. But something that I don’t know if I’d say  I underestimated or couldn’t anticipate was this being called to flex my adaptation muscle, over and over again.

You know when I left New York, for the first couple of weeks I was truly stunned. It was like Oh, what the hell was I thinking? What did I do? I know all of you know what it feels like to go on a great trip and then it always feels so good to go home. I found myself thinking, Oh Lord, five months is a really long time. But that feeling has dissipated and, as I was saying, I was telling Eric that I think that flexing and strengthening this adaptation muscle is the gift that’ll keep on giving later on. It’s something that I hadn’t thought about, didn’t anticipate or couldn’t have anticipated when I left New York. Yes, I knew I was going outside of my comfort zone, but I didn’t realize how frequently that would be happening.

I’d say I’m logging it in my cells I’m building a resiliency that I think could actually be the gift that keeps on giving in ways that I can’t anticipate right now.  I’d say it’s been really healthy and good for me to see and experience my own ability to adapt and to be flexible.

Yes, there are days when I long for my own home and my own bed. Yet I find I’m able to recalibrate – to find my equilibrium – wherever I land these days. It’s funny, sometimes finding that equilibrium can be as simple as going to the market as I did on my very first day here in Punta.  I went to the local market, Tienda Inglesa. and I bought a coffee maker because having my morning practice and having my coffee is critically important to my wellbeing and my equilibrium

So yeah, I think I end by saying that flexing our adaptation muscle is a good thing. Building resiliency. It doesn’t have to be about doing some sort of experiment or traveling like I’m doing right now. It can be as simple as, I don’t know, saying yes to plan B, flexing the muscle of patience and tolerance around our children or our aging parents, and just simply saying yes when your initial instinct is to say no.

I’ll leave you with that thought and I’ll end with a nice quote that’s really resonating with me right now. It’s it’s by Gustave Flaubert. Travel makes one modest. You see what a tiny place you occupy in the world.

And it’s so true. Observing how other people live and conduct their lives. Is such an interesting thing to me, ad it does make me see what a tiny place I occupy in the world. . . Until next time, from my heart to yours.


Now back to the piece about generating questions for myself about where I might go next. On that list I had, Santa Fe, Santa Barbara, Sedona, Costa Rica, Oaxaca, and Mérida, which is the capital of Yucatán where my friend Pia grew up. It’s someplace she thinks I would really love. I’m looking around a little bit, but not too much because I really do want the answer to come to me. I want it to be revealed to me. Yet I have a one-way ticket here to Mexico and the clock is ticking. I need to buy my next ticket, right?

Then what happens next is really incredible. I get pinged on WhatsApp and I listen to this beautiful message from Pia who generously invites me to stay with her in her home in Merida, and to be perfectly honest it truly took my breath away. It was not only the furthest thing from my mind, but I had even said to my friend, Marion, I would never stay with her. I don’t know her that well, but as I’ve said many times before, when you think about the conversational nature of the universe and you ask questions, on some level, we’re hardwired to look for answers and bam, there it was. Pia’s invitation to stay with her was the answer to my question. And here’s the most beautiful thing. I didn’t for one moment question, or second guess it. The answer was delivered to me. It was very clear to me that I was to trust it and to say yes. And so I did. And I even bought my ticket that very day.

I’m sorry if I’m belaboring this point about asking questions and looking for answer, but that’s the way I’m operating right now. And I think it’s fun to share what’s going on and There you have it After the Modern Elder Academy, my next stop is Merida, Mexico, the capital of Yucatan.

That’s all for now. Until next time, from my heart to yours.

Join thousands of others

Stay in the loop on new episodes


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

dear Listeners,

Friends say I live my life out loud. That’s because I’m a curious, adventurous person and, as an appreciator, I simply love to share what lights me up. Consider this is your invitation into my fun, multi-faceted world.

read on

Book an Advisory Session

I absolutely love feedback, please your thoughts

Stay in the loop

join Thousands of others

Get instant alerts as my new episodes drop

From my heart to yours

Share Your Thoughts

book a session


Let’s get to the heart of matters
– to what matters most to you

Schedule time with me to:

“Speaking with Constance helped me to see myself  – and my experience –with fresh perspective.  I got great clarity and completely shifted gears. She totally got it. The experience fully re-energized me.”

Jim Conley – Senior Executive
ex- YouTube, Google, Twitter

Stay in the loop

join Thousands of others

Get instant alerts as my new episodes drop

From my heart to yours